Heidi Holmes

Somewhere between there and then, I am here

2017

Toilet paper, ink, fluorescent light diffuser, hickory smoked petroleum jelly, embroidery thread, pressed and dried Sweet Pea flowers, crimp beads, cotton rag paper, mirror, an un-rehearsed, unscripted performance that may or may not occur at an undetermined time, to be undocumented.

Dimensions variable

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Somewhere between there and then, I am here contemplates the physical, emotional and spiritual experience of in-between-ness.

I’ve been doing In Vitro Fertilization (IVF) for a while, but now I’ve stopped. I hoped I would be a mother, but I’m not. I’m grieving. I feel that I have no purpose, but I am still a body. Still existing. Still in space. I’m not sure what to do next. Where I am now and where I will be soon is not clear. I am only certain that because I’m an artist, I will make work from this position.

The exhibition, Somewhere between there and then, I am here occurred at TCB Art Inc, Melbourne, Australia, September 2017

Notes:

• From ceiling to floor and from wall to wall, a highly intricate, hand sewn floral curtain, was installed. The curtain was photographed and de-installed before the show opened. A limited edition of the photograph is available in the gallery only. The image and the actual curtain are not available in any other format.

• An entire wall is covered in a hickory smoked petroleum jelly (Vaseline) wall. It stinks. The artist’s hand markings can be seen in surface of the petroleum jelly.

• An angled mirror that, at close range, reflects a window’s exact size, creating a loop of bringing the outside in and taking the inside out. The viewer is also visible in the mirror.

• A very detailed drawing on a 25 meter roll of toilet paper was located in the bathroom of the gallery on the opening night. The drawing was to be used and flushed away.

• An un-rehearsed, unscripted performance that may or may not happen at an undetermined time, to be undocumented, unrecovered, never written about. Lost.